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HELLO♥
-------------
i miss you.
i miss your smile.
and i still shed a tear every once in a while.
and even though its different now.
youre still here somehow.
my heart wont let you go.
and i need you to know.
i miss you.


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Vengeance Is Served♥

KELVIN VALENTINO VICTOR. :D
nineteen .
soccer.
playing the guitar.
entertaining people.
14021992.

follow me on Twitter

LOVES♥

her.
my friends.
myself.


DESIRES♥

her.
her.
her.


SPOKEN TEARS♥





LINKS♥

Chandini
Dawn:P
DIANA ! :D
GEn
Hui wen
Jerome
Ralph
Robyn gwee!!
Syndris
someone
someone
someone
someone
someone
someone
someone
someone


MY PAST♥

April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
August 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
October 2011


CREDITS♥
designer: Pu Fang((:
images:X X
pattern: X


♥Thursday, May 29, 2008
@ 4:39 PM

FUCKING BITCH!!!!....I freaking hell trusted you!!!!! told you bout myself.....treated you as a close friend.....and now!!!!you only used me!!!!! I should have known from the begining.....the noly freaking thing i hate more than an enemy...is a fucking betrayer like you!!!!!.....i don't need this friendship anymore....i don't need you fake care....all lies!!!!....all this time......only used me to get what you want....only used me so that you will be able to get closer.....damn u!!!!! i don't need your freaking friendship!!...trusted you too freaking much!!!! GOD WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME!!!!.....ENOUGH!!! i cant take anymore of these test......its just too much.....first sha left me...now this fren i thought who i could really trust ended up only using me!!!! I NEVER WANA SEE YOUR FREAKING FACE RO TALK TO YOUR FREAKING FACE ANYMORE!!!! TO HELL WITH LIFE!!!!!


& to feel yours on mine again♥



♥
@ 3:20 PM

OMG!!!!!I FREAKING KNEW IT!!!!....guess what i suspected really happened.....and now....i know u freaking hell used me.....idiot!!!!just fuck off my life!!!! I finally figured out everything......just freaking used me didnt u....BITCH!!!!.......lets c hw ur life goes now.....u can just freaking hell FUCK OFF!!!...mylife......happy to get away frm u.....


& to feel yours on mine again♥



♥Wednesday, May 28, 2008
@ 3:17 PM

TWO WORDZ FOR YOU!!!!.....FUCK OFF!!!......I HAD ENOUGH OF YOU....Trying to change you...but still.....you thinking you so smart right....u betrayed me.....the only thing i cant forgive in a person is betrayal....dman...i cant believe it took me so long to realise.....you just freakin betrayed me...not only me bout the people around you....think you so smart right...be on your own....i aint gona give two shits bout you anymore.....grow on your own...i dun need you or your friendship......your still immature....thinkin you grown up....relfect on your own freaking self for once!!!....you knew i had my own probz...but still...you wana make it worse.....just get lost aite...i dun need you.....dont ever come tok to me again....i wont bother even touching the fone.....i have the ppl who really care for me out there....not ppl like you who used me to fill ur own emptiness.....AM THE IDIOT!!!.....FREAKING LIFE IS GOING FREAKIN NOWHERE!!!!!......


& to feel yours on mine again♥



♥Tuesday, May 27, 2008
@ 10:21 PM

walao!!!...days damn stressed.....first today wake up go late for remedial then kana screwed by ms teo...walao....she ah...then after that when kfc eat.....somore my friend treat...lucky me....then was so dying wanting to go jamming...but sadly...fasting...so cant....and its day 2 on my abstaing of heavy metal and thos genres realted to it....ITS KILLER!!!....mati sia....come home sleeping the whole time....then wen to go meet jeff at vivo.....and that idiot came to vivo drunk with his girfriend and blabbing to me alot of things of what seth and cecelia talking behind my back....i seriously dont give a shit anymore aready....


Then...went church for some briefing for pre con camp.....haha i hope the pre confirmants have fun......Anw.....just read diana blog.....and well...what she says is true.....everyone just wish that they could just turn back time....even i too wish that i could just go back to the past....and just change everything.....i wouldnt turn out like this.....if only i had that chance....lifes gettin mre screwed each day.....people saying i causing them trouble...and i causing their break ups....wtf!!! i didnt even do any shit.....my whole band is giving me a headache...somre o lvls....i just wish everyone can just go away!!! why am i getting these thoughts....these mood swings.....I NEED ANSWERES!!!


& to feel yours on mine again♥



♥Tuesday, May 20, 2008
@ 8:25 PM

Well....this post isnt about anything that happen tat was happy....just have to say ....FUCK YOU SETH!!!......you are a fucking idiotic vocalist and a band leader!!!for thise whole year i was like listening to your advice.....eventhough ur satanic....ur an ass!!! dumb dog....before cecelia joined the band i told u nt to influence her!!!! u sweared to me!!! u just make me fucking pissed!! Jeff just came out of this satanice shit last week...now u wan cecelia to go in?? i told u not to bring her for ur fukin meetings!!!....she can even ask me wether she should join ur meeting often!!!....Look i was once like u....bt i made sure i changed my life...so tat i wldnt turn out to be you!!! you are an idiot.....cecelia has been my fren since i was like pre k!!!u idiot.....u turned a nice girl into a follower of u!!!DAMN U!!! WTH DID SATAN EVER DO ANY GD FOR U....!!!!

Cause of this freakin prob i cant talk to anyone properly.......i told her all the good things bout u.....but yet.....u still come to do this.....i respected u alot...all tat respect is gone nw.....i dun need this stinkin band anymore!! this is why i have been avoidin u guys for these few days.....stop spreadin ur satanic shit around man!!!


To add mre pain.....ppl suspecting me of tryin to ruin their relation ship....the girl i loved alot....dare tell ppl around tat we oni were att for a day.....lies everywhere...betrayal......and for me...anger depression regret!!!i hate this freakin moods!!!! i cant even think of writing a song anymore.....why does my life have to be the screwed up one....i just cant take anymore of this....this type of things make me regret why the fuck i didnt jump on that day.....my frenz tellin me i having mood swings.....wth is wrong wif me....i need answers!!!


& to feel yours on mine again♥



♥Sunday, May 18, 2008
@ 6:18 PM

Well....been a few days since my last post.....lifes feelin better now....still writing songs and poems....but the thing is ....now i really understand what i write.....the songs i used to write...now i can play happily play infront of my friends and band......all the songs written at my down times i can finally play it to people....haha....lifes been really better....anw today when church and for the sec3 class.....francis gave a talk on gifts of the holy spirit and was really fun.....then later went purmei to slack.....and diana!! she pang seh me siol....pang seh kia



Anw then came back home...talkin to jeff bout god more....i cant belive that satanic dog wan god in his life now....damn he changed alot.....my prayers really worked.....mt O's coming soon.....stress....o ya and somemore nicolette come talking to me....after like duno how long...wah she still can remember me ah...haha.....yest talk about the past all to her and we were like laughing bout it....haha she also 1 weird girl.....lifes changin...and i never ever felt better....anw today was bored....and just thinking....because of sharmini...i got stronger...and because of her alot of things happen....so my new song....and P.S...its a happy song...first time riting a happy one



Because of you



my world is now whole,



Because of you



love lives in my soul.



Because of you



I have laughter in my eyes,



Because of you



I am no longer afraid of good-byes.



You are my pillar



my stone of strength,



With me through all seasons



and great times of length.



My love for you is pure



boundless through space and time,



it grows stronger everyday



with the knowledge that



you'll always be mine.



At the altarI will joyously say 'I do',



for I have it all now



and it's all because of you.



And its not a copyright of kelly clarksons because of you song!!...haha....hope this happiness last long....i hate it when my friends are sad cause they fail tryin to make me happy.....for all the people out there who cared for me and helped me in my time of need....i thank you all.....even if some of you hate me...i still thank you all.....you guys and girls are the best people in my life....will never forget u guyz.....haha tc u all



I know how you feel inside



I've been there before



& to feel yours on mine again♥



♥Saturday, May 10, 2008
@ 7:55 PM

Wah..yest never go praise....dam sad...stupid leg injury and my mum never allow....well yest last day of paper.....so after that went to play soccer for duno how long....then went jamming with Jeff,Eric and cecilia.Got injured in soccer still go jamming and leg got worse....my mum made me not go cause hate to rest n blah blah.....missed goin eventhough for 1 day:(......anw.....went movie today...gilian woke me up....haha....well...we went to watch speedracer....me, ralph, calvin, dennis, veronica, diana, gilian.....the movie cost $10...dam....haha...anw....the movie was real nice..but the brother was an idiot man...haha...anw the girls went toilet and some1 took verons handphone and wallet....TAT BITCH!!!......dam man.....den me n ralph went to the inof counter and asked around....poor veron....then gil and diana bought ice-cream for her to cheer her up...she was abit happier....then we went macs to eat ice-cream....there tok loadz more crap.....and i found out that gillian had amzaing art skills.....i think i shall ask her design my bands logo.....hopefully she will agree....then ralph had to leave and we went to page1 and looking at some books and the girls wanted to see SEVENTEEN.....nonsense la they....then went to candy empire and giant to buy sweets and chocos.....after that dennis veron and calvin left....i followed diana and gillian to all the shops to go shop....man it felt like having a gf again....haha.....anw....they ltr went zara...and gillian was trying out all the high-heels...and tried to out height me...haha too bad gil....anw....after that we left ardy...haha today really fun day.....keeps e away frm all the bad things that happen and are still happening in life....and well...i guess thoughts of sharmini are just fading away day by day.....i mean....she really hates me....and i even had a small thought she still loved me....well if we were meant to be....life wouldnt be like this would it......lifes gettin abit happier......i just dun want sharmini back in my life.....shes happy...let her be happy....i have really learnt the true meaning of love...

LOVE= Keep the person you love happy no matter what.....

Well .....i really loved her....so i wan her to be happy eventhough its not with me......shes happy with that guy....so i shall leave her alone....kas is also happy with jeremy ....so i left her to b happy wif him last yr.....guess i have to do it again....but wif sha....let those two b happy.....thats what i want........but sha just hurt me alot this whole year....and well....let her be happy...sharmini.....if ur reading this....im sorry for disturbing your relationship with your guy if i did.....guess i should just really leave you alone....im sorry....anw...i just wrote this song for you.....if i could....i wish i can play it to you one day.....can see how crazy i was...the last tears i ever shed for you.....

Tears I'll wipe away the tears that surround my eyes,

I'll look up to the sky and pray that my wish come true,

Remember all the fun times,

Remember how much we'd be together,

All the time I'd think about you,

The tears start to fall again,

The wish has been broken,

The time has come,

When I'll see,

The true side,

Of you,

The pain builds up,

I can't help but scream,

It hurts so much,

To cry in pain,

Is all I can do..


Well...guess the tears are gone....i really hope you read this....hope no more probs come in your relationship because of me.....my life has to go on...i cant keep remembering the past....it just hurts alot....only remembering the happy moments we had....the day we got att at punggol....that day i will never forget in my life....the smile i had...all i will never forget....hope the new guy is better than all your ex's...i wish you all the best....as for me....i feel better in life.....theres a new meaning in life for me.....everything is gone...but the emories remain...

When you looked me in the eye.

I caught a glimpse of heaven


& to feel yours on mine again♥



♥Saturday, May 3, 2008
@ 11:09 PM

Well.....it took me a whole week to figure my whole life out......i just got so lost....i didnt even know what to do....praying at night asking god what he wants me to do....asking him to guide me....asking him why arent things going how i planned.....for a whole week got blinded....and then....a good friend of mine came to me.....and talked to me about her problem.....and i talked to her and helped her out....showed her a story which made her feel better and happier....and after reading that story again and again....well i finally realised....things may not be going my way, but it doesnt mean i have to take it in a bad way....well the story of the three tress.....really helped me wish it can help you.....

Once there were three trees on a hill in the woods.
They were discussing there hopes and dreams when the first tree said,"
Someday I hope to be a treasure chest. I could be filled with gold, silver, and precious gems. I could be decorated with intricate carving and everyone would see the beauty."
Then the second tree said," Someday I will be a mighty ship.
I will take Kings and Queens across the waters and sail to the corners of the world.
Everyone will feel safe in me, because of the strength of my hull."
Finally the third tree said, "I want to grow to be the tallest and the straightest tree in the forest.
People will come to see me on top of the hill and look up to my branches and think of the heavens and God and how close to them I am reaching.
I will be the greatest tree of all time and people will always remember me."
After a few years of praying that their dreams would come true. A group of woodsmen came upon the tree.
When one came to the first he said," I think I should be able to sell the wood to a carpenter"... and he began cutting it down. The tree was happy, because he new the carpenter would make him into a treasure chest.
At the second tree the woodsmen said," This looks like a strong tree, I should be able to sell it to a shipyard.” The second tree was happy because he knew he was on his way to become a mighty ship.
When the woodsmen came upon the third tree, the tree was frightened because knew that if they cut him down, his dreams would not come true. One of the woodsmen said, "I don't need anything special from my tree, so I'll take this one," and cut it down.
When the first tree arrived at the carpenters, he was made into a feed box for the animals. He was then placed in a barn and filled with hay. This was not at all what he prayed for.
The second tree was cut and made into a small fishing boat. His dreams of becoming a mighty ship and carrying Kings had come to an end.
The third was cut into large pieces and left alone in the dark.
The years went by, and the trees forgot about there dreams. Then one day, a woman and man came to the barn. She gave birth and they placed the baby on the hay in the feed box that was made for the first tree. The man wished that he could have made a crib for the baby, but this manger would have to do. The tree could feel the importance of this event and knew that he held the greatest treasure of all time.
Years later, a group of men got in the fishing boat made from the second tree. One of them was tired and went to sleep. While they were on the water, a great storm arose and the tree didn't think it was strong enough to keep the men safe.
The men woke the sleeping man, and he stood and said, "PEACE", and the storm stopped. At this time, the tree knew that he had carried the King of Kings in its boat.
Finally, someone came and got the third tree. It was carried through the streets as people mocked the man who was carrying it. When they came to a stop, the man was nailed to the tree and raised in the air to die at the top of the hill. When Sunday came, the tree came to realize that it was strong enough to stand at the top of the hill and be close to GOD as possible, because Jesus was crucified on it.
The moral of the story is that when things don't seem to be going your way, always know that God has a plan for you.
If you place your trust in Him, he will give you great gifts. Each of the trees got what they wanted, just not in the way they imagined. We don't always know what God's plans are for us. We just know that His ways are not our ways, but His ways are always best.

Now...i realised what i want in life...intense prayer to god has made me realise...and what i want in life is clear.....because of her....i cant ruin my life.....its always hard to say goodbye......but the feeling after that would be better.....


& to feel yours on mine again♥